Life and How To Live It II

Have you ever been in your car and the music is so enrapturing that you just feel like ignoring your exit and just driving onwards? I often have those moments, but I never take the leap of faith. I truly am a creature to discipline.

But on my way home, I often do engage my whims. For instance, the other night, I was feeling a bit bummed out (yes, even birds of whimsy like myself have our descension days; it is what keeps us striving higher -- perhaps that is why Icarus flew so close to the sun -- he was in search of the perpetual high, but in the words of Mike Scott, he experienced the folly of "reaching too high, too far, too soon"), so I went to see "Knocked Up." Talk about kismet. Not only was the movie the perfect cure for what ailed me, but it offered a seering insight into relationships. At its core, are two relationships -- one on the ascent, but not your typical Hollywood movie relationship -- and how can it ever be typical when one of the partners is Seth Rogen and the other is Katherine Heigl. The other relationship is on the descent, and it is a married couple. Rare is the movie that captures the full nuance of one relationship; this one managed to encapsulate two relationships; and, in so doing, defined the essence of pre-marital and marital relationships. In fact, as I was mentioning to someone earlier today, this movie should replace pre-marital counseling so succinct (well, as succinct as a comedy longer than two hours can be) and effective is its impact.

I could go on and on about this movie, but here are the points that currently resonate with me, or are just merely points of interest. First, it is not unique in that it deglamorizes marriage; it seems every piece of culture does that today; the uniqueness is in how it reconstructs the concept of marriage as it deconstructs the marriage in the movie -- and for the hopeless romantics out there -- it does not plunge the marriage into an abyss -- instead it finds an equilibrium point. So yes there is hope out there, if both parties are willing to commit to finding that equilibrium. And often that equilibrium is not holding hands in the park, or candlelit dinners, but sharing in the joy of a birthday party for your child. Second, it avoids the clichés to which many romantic comedies fall prey -- when the two main protagonists find their relationship hitting a rocky point it is not due to another man or woman or even some relationship cataclysmic event (you know -- devices like the man worrying about the relationship ending so he cheats on her -- I can't speak for other men, but I know that if I fear a relationship that I want to continue is about to implode I would not throw a burning match at it; or here is another one, the friends/family of the couple contribute to the distancing -- here the sister is obviously not thrilled with the relationship and makes that clear; but she is not the cause of the break-up). The break-up is due to life, and not just life, but the more mundane aspects of life. Third, the wife and kids in the movie are the wife and kids of the director/writer/producer. I only learned this after seeing the movie, but it explains how the family seemed so genuine in the movie.

So it is truly the rare comedy that will not only have you laughing, but leave you with a lot to think about, and a lot to find hope in. What more could you ask for?!