Women in Love

In honor of my 300^th post, more insight into who I am. I had mentioned in my 200^th post that there was a second literary character to which I was linked. Before I identify the character, some background. In my senior year in high school, I had one of the most inspirational and brilliant teachers I ever had. The class was AP English and my teacher was the type who had incredible insight into her students. She could identify their inner talents and get the most out of them. As with many brilliant minds, however, she had her inner demons. She was manic-depressive and an alcoholic; a lethal combination. I was her aide and I soon began to realize that she was drinking frequently. When she did drink, she was usually drunk by the afternoon. At one point, she was so drunk, that she asked me to grade her papers. I do hope she reviewed my grading, but I am not sure if she did. One evening during the summer after I graduated from high school she called me at my home number. She told me she was going to commit suicide and asked me to come over. I did not go over, but I did call one of the other teachers I knew who got her some help. I never spoke to her again after that. I know she did get some psychiatric help and I believe she was able to return to teaching.

At any rate, she told me one day that I was Birkin, one of the male protagonists in Women in Love; Birkin was also the alter ego of the author, D.H. Lawrence. Of course, that did prod me to read the book, and I did see a lot of similarities in certain aspects of Birkin, particularly in regard to his ideal conception of love, termed by James Ross MacDonald as "part of his vision of the ideal human relationship as "a pure stable equilibrium" of individual wills, in which neither fully succumbs or dominates." Birkin also was an intellectual who preached anti-intellectualism (perhaps this explains my blog) and was searching for the transcendent state of being. This transcendence, according to Eugene Goodheart, would hopefully free him from the diminutions of human life and place him in oneness with the cosmic order. Other parts of Birkin are quite off the mark in regard to me, but ultimately it was a rather incredible comparison by my teacher.