Brighton Makes Landmark Bid

The crack Curling Today reporting team has learned that Brighton, CO has submitted a bid for the Summer 2012 Olympics. The Brighton Olympic Organizing Team (“BOOT”)’s bid, which failed to factor in that London has already been awarded the 2012 Olympics, was premised on the belief that the IOC would like to continue the trend of having the Summer Olympics in cities that begin with the letter “B”. Its slogan is “Brighton, the Beijing of the West.” The head of BOOT admitted he knew nothing about Beijing save for what he learned from “Where in the World is Matt Lauer” four years ago, but figures they can easily outdo the Beijing bid. Initial plans include building the Olympic Stadium around the Eagle Statue/landfill, with the stadium becoming the largest landfill in Colorado after the Olympics. Brighton will also build a sandlot field for baseball, again not realizing that baseball is no longer an Olympic sport. Instead of a swimming pool, the organizers said the Barr Lake will serve as the swimming venue. And the marathon will be run on I-85. No word yet on whether the Blog will serve as the greeter for the Games.