Friday, December 25, 2009
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Seriously?!
A tabloid reporter was hounding Elin outside a Thai restaurant in Orlando. One of the questions asked was “How do you feel about his 14 mistresses?” What answer did the reporter expect? Did he think she would say:
“I don’t know them too well, but I am getting to know more about them, and the more I hear, the more I like them. I can see what Tiger saw in each and every one of them. I hope to grow closer to them and perhaps start a book or knitting club with them.”
And speaking of book clubs, Tiger blew his chance to be the next Oprah. Apparently a book that was seen in the pictures of the front seat of his wrecked car shot up the chart on Amazon. The book was a physics book.
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Jersey Shore
I don’t know how MTV does it, but they have come up with another guilty pleasure that is more addictive than sugar. Jersey Shore is not a reality show; it is an anthropological study of the species known as the Guido.
According to Wikipedia:
"Guido" (or "Gino") is a slang term for a lower class or working class urban Italian American. The Guido stereotype is often portrayed as humorously thuggish with an overtly macho attitude. The time period in which it obtained this meaning is not clear, but it was certainly in use with this meaning by the early part of the 21st century.
The MTV reality show Jersey Shore is based on eight people in Seaside Heights, New Jersey who are referred to as "guidos." Originally named Guido Beach, the name was changed after objections from Italian-American organizations including the National Italian American Foundation. The people in this reality show use the term with pride to describe themselves. Females on the show refer to themselves as "guidas" or "guidettes".
From what I can ascertain on the show, guidos and guidas are the horniest mammals around. It seems they are constantly in mating mode and every trip to a nightclub leads to numerous, interconnected hook-ups. The guidas get very jealous when the guidos go mating in another tribe and they get very protective of their turf, which in this case is the communal hot tub.
I am truly amazed and fascinated. I have had tons of friends from Jersey and I have never experienced this subspecies. All I can say is that Marlon Perkins would have had a field day with them. And they make the Real World characters seem chaste in comparison.
Monday, December 14, 2009
So you want to go to law school . . .
Thursday, December 10, 2009
You might as well face it, he’s . . .
. . . addicted to sex. Is Tiger Woods a sex addict? The Today Show seems to think so even going to the lengths of interviewing Sex Rehab Dr. Drew Pinsky. The running count of mistresses is at nine, and two of them are apparently adult film stars. According to a video on TMZ, one of the adult film stars says she was the one “picked” by Tiger to go into his bedroom during his bachelor party. She said he was very polite and a gentleman; so I guess his parents did raise him well. :)
As we learn more and more, the odds of his marriage and/or endorsements surviving this are growing slimmer and slimmer.
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Latest 911 Call from the Woods Residence
911 Operator: Hello, 911 Operator here.
Caller: Woof, wooof, woofa, woo, Tony the Tiger, woof, wookie, wook. (Translation: Hello, this is Tony the Tiger, Tiger’s dog. Yeah, I know, he is really creative with pet names, NOT!!!).
911 Operator: What is the emergency?
Caller: Woof, wook, cook, look, @$%#! woof, wooo, woooooof, woof! (Translation: Please get me out of this [Jerry] house right now! The people here are either cheatin’, poppin’, screamin’, or faintin’.)
911 Operator: Sorry, with our recent budget cuts, and with Tiger’s money being offshore and therefore untaxable, we have no canine-trained EMTs.
Caller: Woof, wooof, woo, woof, woofa, wfado, wooff woofof woof! (Translation: What kind of third world gated community is this? I got better treatment when Kultida took me to Thailand. At least can you send me some Kibble & Bits – no one has gone to buy dog food in days. I am sick of eating those golf club covers).
L.A. Sizzle
I have been to Beverly Hills and Melrose (both drive-bys) and they are certainly worlds apart. But last night on the CW they combined for an incendiary two hours of tv watching. The first week of December is the end of putative fall tv season and all the shows have a quasi-cliffhanger until they return in January or later. On 90210, the cliffhanger was not that great, but all that came before it was. Old couples reigniting; new ones fading; a drug dealer exposed; one addiction ending; a new one beginning. I was not satisfied with one plot development which left me with a sour taste, but leave it to Melrose to sweeten things up. After weeks of snail-like development, the floodgates are opened – engagement ended; passion ignited; murderer uncovered and then taken for a dip; and an unexpected twist. 2010 should be a huge year for both shows – it brings back memories of the heyday of the original shows (when they were back-to-back).
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Food for Thought
Human Rights For Men and Women in Intimate Relationships
The right to share equally with your partner all decisions and responsibilities related to your relationship, children, home and finances.
The right to share equally with your mate in all financial decisions.
The right to have friendships outside of your relationship as long as you do not violate the privacy of your relationship with your partner.
The right to express your opinion and then be given the same respect and consideration as those of your mate.
The right to have and express your sexual needs and desires without feeling like you are selfish, demanding, or aggressive.
The right to have your emotional, physical and intellectual needs be as important as the needs of your mate.
The right to expect your mate to do his/her part to resolve difficulties to your relationship.
The right to hold your mate responsible for his or her behavior rather than assuming that responsibility yourself.
The right to seek professional help with your relationship.
The right never to be physically attacked or emotionally degraded by your mate and the right to end the relationship (and to seek safety), if either occurs.
The right to expect significant behavioral changes rather than apologies and promises from your partner if a single battering incident occurs.
The right to not blame yourself if the relationship in which you have invested so much love and effort ends.
Monday, December 7, 2009
A Second Cup and a Second Chance
I am all about second chances so I decided to afford Perky Cups a second chance. I did not anticipate offering it a second chance but I happened to be judging a debate tournament at a high school that was about 500 yards away from the strip mall housing Perky Cups so I decided to stop by.
What a difference in service this time around. I was greeted when I walked in, and both the barista and cashier were friendly (and, of course, decked out in their bikini tops even though the temperature was in the teens). And while I was a bit concerned when the barista told the cashier she had never made a cappuccino before (which was my order), and even though the cashier gave me the wrong pastry from the pastry case, all worked out well as the cappuccino was very good (apparently they use Peaberry coffee). There was only other customer other than myself so if you are interested in giving Perky Cups a chance, you should head there soon.
Friday, December 4, 2009
Remembering the Salahis
Hey, Men, Get Your Boobs Out! -- The Cut
This may be the most staggering (and possibly disturbing) development in men's fashion since the invention of man spankx a/k/a mankx. Is the world really ready for men's cleavage? Is the world really ready for hairy cleavage (or are men supposed to start waxing their cleavage)? Will husbands/boyfriends be fighting with their wives/girlfriends for use of the Miraculous Bra?
All in the Family
Kimberly Harris, the sister of Jarius Adams, who called 911, told troopers that Woods' mother, Kultida, and mother-in-law, Barbro Holmberg, were at the scene. This little nugget of info, as with everything in this case, raises more questions than answers. One, is Barbro an actual name? Two, do mothers live with Tiger and Elin, and, if so, how come they did not hear the commotion inside the house (apparently Kultida was overheard asking “What is going on?”)? Is Tiger’s house so big (a la the Shanahan house) that neither Kultida or Barbro could hear anything? Why didn’t Tiger go run behind his mother as opposed to going outside (Kultida looks like she is a tough cookie)? Did Earl ever cheat on Kultida? If so, did Kultida turn the other cheek?
Also, per ESPN, Thursday, Rachel Uchitel, a New York nightclub hostess who has denied having an affair with Woods, had scheduled a news conference with her attorney in Los Angeles. But attorney Gloria Allred canceled that appearance Thursday morning, citing unforeseen circumstances. She earlier had planned to make a statement about Uchitel's relationship with Woods. Again more questions? If there, was in fact, no relationship between Urkel and Tiger, what more is there to say about it? That they were pen pals? They liked to talk about stamp collecting? And, at this point, what circumstances could possibly be “unseen”. Were “Inside Edition” and “Access Hollywood” putting in last minute bids to secure the non-story about the non-relationship?
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
The TK Staff . . .
Is Tiger the New Wilt?
24-year-old Jaimee Grubbs, who recently appeared on VH1's dating show 'Tool Academy.' Grubbs claims that she and Tiger participated in a 31-month fling together. Us, which will hit newsstands on Wednesday, is reporting that Grubbs and Woods engaged in 20 sexual encounters.
She allegedly has more than 300 text messages from Woods, as well as a voicemail in which Tiger discusses how his wife may have found out about their affair, Us reports.
"The Tiger story has gone nuclear," says David Perel, executive vice president of RadarOnline.com. "The early morning accident has triggered a flood of information regarding Tiger and other women, and by the end of this week, there are going to be at least one other woman -- possibly even more -- on the record alleging a sexual affair with the golfing great."
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Friends Don’t Let Friends Drive . . .
. . . shoeless. This nugget has flown under the radar in the whole Crouching Tiger, Hidden Elin drama. According to TMZ:
Tiger was wearing shorts, a t-shirt and no shoes. It's illegal in Florida to drive without shoes.
Read more: http://www.tmz.com/2009/11/30/tiger-woods-accident-eye-witness-account-elin-nordegren/#ixzz0YRyhZTLs
Now, generally a person going at 2 in the morning to get milk or diapers for the kids would wear shoes. A person would race out and drive without shoes only if they were fleeing someone or something . . . perhaps a golf club?!
As a public service message, the Blog urges everyone to drive with shoes. Driving without shoes is just as dangerous as texting while driving.
Monday, November 30, 2009
Dear Tiger
We are not stupid. The most plausible scenario for you floating in and out of consciousness and sporting lacerations for what you admit was a minor accident at a low speed is that your injuries occurred prior to your entrance in your car. And unless your dear wife, Elin, carries a golf club around with her at all times either because it reminds her of you or she finds it the modern-day equivalent of the Swiss army knife, the most plausible scenario proffered to date is that she inflicted the injuries on you with said golf club prior to you entering the car. And naturally we will think that the timing of the National Enquirer article and said accident are not coincidental. So if you want us to stop thinking the way we do, give us a more plausible story, or failing that, tell us the truth. And yes, you have an obligation to do so, because a potential crime was involved and public resources were utilized in both the investigation of the accident and the transport to the hospital.
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Perky Cups
I, of course, felt duty bound to my loyal readers to go check out the new coffee place in an Aurora strip mall (pardon the pun). Now why would anyone go all the way to Aurora for a cup of java? Well this is the place that taps into the new trend started in a couple of Seattle coffee shops of baristas dressing in bikinis. Perky Cups is the first in the Denver area of what appears to be a franchise.
The place was hard to find even with my navigation. It is literally in the corner of a strip mall. It has replaced an old Peaberrys and the sign for Perky Cups was literally taped over the Peaberry sign. In fact, the first part had fallen off to reveal the “P” in the Peaberry sign.
I ventured in. The decor was passable modern coffee house style albeit a bit spartan. I guess they invest in other things. The pastries seemed store-bought. The coffee machines did appear to be state-of-the-art, however (probably the old Peaberry ones).
The baristas were perky in the sense intended, and very cute, but the customer service was not perky. The cashier asked me what I wanted and I asked what she recommended and she did not seem to like that query. So I quickly ordered a latte macchiato. Even a $1 tip did not seem to change her disposition. The latte itself was clinically-made. No banter between the baristas and the customers. In fact, the baristas seemed absorbed in their own conversations and the making of the coffee seemed to impede that. The conversations were too racy for me to describe here, but suffice to say it was a more adult version of high school gossip.
The latte macchiato was ok. Not worth a trip all the way to Aurora. And unless the customer service improves, I don’t think I will be making a repeat visit. Perky Cups could learn a thing or two from Tilted Kilt as to how to ensure its clientele comes back. Without such lessons learned, Perky Cups is not likely to have a better fate than the Peaberrys.
Saturday, November 28, 2009
Hard to Say Goodbye
Have you ever thought of the sheer numbers of people who pass through your life? I am not talking about people you see in the street or in a mall; I am talking about people you have some connection to, no matter how minimal. You find yourself growing attached to these people or you grow attached to these people being part of your lives even if it is just saying hi. One such person was one of the employees of the management company for my complex. She also lived in my building with her boyfriend or husband. She was always very nice and helpful with any issues pertaining to my apartment. One Sunday she attended mass at my church with her boyfriend/husband. I think they were “church shopping” and I convinced them that my church was a great church to make their parish. I would see them periodically at mass. Recently, however, whenever I would see her she was alone. She also started attending mass on her own. And then, a few weeks ago she started attending with an older couple who appeared to be her parents.
Well today I found out she is moving. When I asked her about her move she gave a sad look and said nothing more. There must be some back story to her move and why her boyfriend/husband was no longer around. But I will never know that back story as I will never know the back stories for the hundreds of people I have known in some manner in my life. Their lives may be filled with tragedy or happiness, loneliness or companionship . . . . These details I will never know. But I know they are relevant to how they entered into my life and how they will exit my life.
I will miss her. You want your life filled with kind people who are nice to you. She by no means reached the level of a friend; our interaction was generally limited to brief exchanges of pleasantries or apartment-related matters. But I had grown accustomed to her smile when she said hi.
I always find it hard when people exit my life no matter how limited the connection they may have had to me. I grow attached to baristas, convenience store or deli workers, even the people who clean my office. Recently the woman who cuts my hair unexpectedly left my life. I showed up for my appointment one Friday evening and the salon, which she had owned, was empty. All that was left were the bare walls. I called and left a message but I never heard back. I had just bumped into her the week before at Chucky Cheese. She made no mention of her salon’s demise. This woman had cut my hair for nearly five years. She knew a lot about my life, and I of hers. She had gone through a divorce and so she gave me a lot of advice on that. I had followed her through various salons, even one in Southwest Plaza, until she got her own one in Lone Tree. And then poof, she was gone. Again I will never know the full story. I did find out from the adjacent Caribou Coffee that her salon had been struggling for a while during the recession and that they finally had to close it down.
I will miss her as well, just as I will miss the others who have passed through my life – particularly those who enriched it in some way. It is hard to say goodbye – even to acquaintances.
Friday, November 27, 2009
An Education
Two movies, wholly unrelated, but linked by a thread of a thematic connection. In one, a brilliant student is denied a Public Speaking scholarship because the Professor tells him he needs to go out into the world and learn a point of view. He does, nearly destroying himself along the way, but the education he garners is much more than he would have received in any university.
The other brilliant student, is urged to deny the education of the world for education of books. She refuses this advice and almost destroys herself. Ultimately for her, the education of books is to be her salvation.
I saw both movies today. One, on cable, titled Music Within. The other, in theaters, An Education, is sure to garner much Oscar attention particularly for Carey Mulligan, whose performance renders her not only one of the frontrunners for the Best Actress Oscar but as the rightful heir to Audrey Hepburn.
Ultimately I will provide no judgment on either mode of education. Powerful cases are made for both approaches. I will say, however, that the movies are quite excellent in their own respective ways.
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Monday, November 23, 2009
Sunday, November 22, 2009
The New Mode of Marriage Proposals?
Marissa, will you marry me? from justin on Vimeo.
Friday, November 20, 2009
Have a Bad Day Day
Today is Have a Bad Day Day, which is the only day that people are encouraged to be rude in the workplace. The day started because people were sick to death of being told to “have a good day” by salespeople. On Have a Bad Day Day, salespeople are given permission to tell their customers just that—have a bad day.
But, really, why should the sales department have all the fun today? There are plenty of people that deserve to be insulted in the workplace—bad bosses, evil coworkers, annoying customers, parking lot attendants, you name it. To help you be more abusive today, here is a compilation of insults that you may (or may not) want to try out in the office. But caveat emptor: Just because you would like to unleash a torrent of abuse in your workplace, doesn’t mean you should. But it’s fun to fantasize—and it won’t put you at risk of job hunting tomorrow.
1. “Are you always this stupid or are you making a special effort today?”
2. “I don't know what makes you so dumb, but it really works.”
3. “Brains aren't everything. In fact, in your case they're nothing.”
4. “He does the work of three men: Larry, Curly, and Moe.”
5. “I heard you got a brain transplant and the brain rejected you.”
6. “He doesn't know the meaning of the word "fear"—but then again he doesn't know the meaning of most words.”
7. “I don't want you to turn the other cheek—it's just as ugly.”
8. “See, that's what's meant by dark and handsome. When it's dark, he's handsome.”
9. “The only squeeze he's concerned with is the one he can give his secretary.”
10. “His definition of mixing business with pleasure is spiking his secretary's drinks.”
11. “The only skill he's ever developed is the art of being obnoxious.”
12. “He's not been himself lately—he's been almost bearable.”
13. "Every girl has the right to be ugly, but you abused the privilege."
14. “As an outsider, what do you think of the human race?”
15. “He's the type of man who doesn't leave anything to your imagination and leaves even less to your patience.”
16. “Anything she hears goes in one ear and out through the telephone.”
17. “Don't you need a license to be that ugly?”
18. “He is living proof that man can live without a brain.”
19. “I bet your mother has a loud bark.”
20. “He's such a liar, you can't even believe him when he says that he's only lying.”
BD at DMV
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Monday, November 16, 2009
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Bonus Season
To: Associates
Re: Bonuses 2009
We are pleased to announce that the year-end bonus amount for each associate class is some fraction of the following:
Class of 2008 - a bagel*
Class of 2007 - $100**
Class of 2006 - grab bag
Class of 2005 - one spin on the bonus wheel
Class of 2004 - a kiss on the lips from a senior partner
Class of 2003 - continued health insurance coverage***
Class of 2002 - $30,000****
*Plain only. Cream cheese subject to the discretion of the Managing Partners.
** $100 bonus processing fee applies.
*** "Health insurance coverage" is for entertainment purposes only.
****$30,000 payable in 30,000 annual installments of $1.
Bonuses will be issued at a breakfast on Friday, December 32nd. Food will not be provided. Absent special circumstances (approved by the Managing Partners), an associate must be able to fly in order to be eligible for the bonus. The Firm does not apply any billable hour or similar criteria in determining eligibility for associate bonuses, except for an underlying requirement that in order to be eligible for the bonus, an associate must have billed at least 8,761 hours over the past twelve months. Attorneys who are working part-time will receive a pro-rated portion of the applicable class-level bonus determined by a proprietary formula that spits out the number zero regardless of the inputs.
The Committee bases its compensation decisions on individual achievement, performance, work quality, a touch of whimsy, and compliance with Firm policy. In this round of compensation decisions we took into account time sheet delinquencies, both real and manufactured by our IT department. The Committee reduced compensation by up to 110% for some individuals because they consistently failed to comply with the Firm's time entry policy, requiring that you record your time prior to experiencing it.
Associates in the class of 2006 are eligible for the grab bag. Many of you have had questions about the grab bag; others have had questions about the screaming coming from conference room 35A. We are pleased to inform you that the two issues are very much related: the grab bag, for purposes of this year's bonus distribution, is a large bag filled with associates who were affected by the reduction in force we experienced earlier this year, and have been recaptured by the firm in recent weeks. Associates eligible for the grab bag will have the chance to reach into the bag and remove an ex-associate, who will be yours to keep. You will, of course, be responsible for all incidental costs associated with the ownership of a former associate, including food, clothing, health insurance, and the providing of rewarding professional opportunities. Or, like us, you may choose to withhold from your associate some or all of those benefits. Be careful: in beta tests of the grab bag, we have discovered that the grab bag often grabs back.
Finally, to qualify for a chance at an additional $500 bonus, you may spin the bonus wheel located in the lobby. Any associate in the class of 2008 who chooses to spin the wheel will automatically forfeit his or her bagel. Associates spin the wheel at their own risk. We are not responsible for any injuries caused by the bonus wheel. The bonus wheel contains small parts not suitable for associates with less than three years of law firm experience, and should be spun solely under the strict supervision of a member of the Executive Committee. We reserve the right to substitute any prizes won on the bonus wheel with a bonus of equal or lesser value. Any associate who chooses to spin the bonus wheel will no longer be eligible for a bonus. Any associate who chooses not to spin the bonus wheel will no longer be eligible for a bonus.
Further regulations regarding the issuance of bonuses will be distributed at a later date, and will retroactively apply to bonuses you may have received in the past. All bonuses are subject to clawbacks.
We thank you for your hard work and dedication throughout 2009.
The Partners of the Firm.
To Spanx or Not to Spanx
Before Jessica Kraus put on a tight-fitting frock one recent evening, she wriggled into a $76 piece of flesh-toned underwear that extended from the bottom of her bra to mid-thigh. She felt confident and svelte as she left her apartment to meet friends for cocktails.
Then a few hours later, the 25-year-old Boston event planner was faced with what she says was a "horrific situation." As she was embracing a man she had met that night, Ms. Kraus got to thinking about what lurked beneath her sleek exterior.
"There's no graceful way of taking the thing off," she says.
Sales of "shapewear"—undergarments for women who want a flawless, bulge-free silhouette while wearing tight clothes—have taken off since 2000. That's when Oprah Winfrey declared a brand called Spanx, with its bright packaging and product names like Bod-a-Bing! and Hide & Sleek, one of her "favorite things." The size of the market has tripled over that time, to $750 million in annual sales through the end of 2008, according to market-research firm NPD Group.
As one of the stars of the TV drama series "Melrose Place" said in a recent episode: "Perfection is as easy as a good pushup bra and some Spanx."
But the practicalities of actually wearing the undergarments are somewhat more complicated.
Brittany Bohn, 27, a lawyer in Chicago, locked herself in the bathroom at a local bar to wriggle out of what she calls a "girdle/long-underwear contraption" that was rolling down her rib cage and making her bulges look bigger than they actually are.
A History of Undergarments
From whalebone corsets of the 1500s to today's Spanx undergarments, here's a look at women's shapewear through the ages.
So what's driving sales of these garments? "It's like this competitive thing we have with other women," says Mary Pantier, a 40-year-old yoga instructor in Erie, Colo., who accidentally flashed her Spanx, worn under her workout ensemble, while in a downward-dog pose in class.
Ms. Pantier's husband, Hank, 35, doesn't get it. "If you stuff five pounds into a two-pound container, it doesn't make the five pounds smaller. It just makes it stranger-looking and uncomfortable," says Mr. Pantier, who has told his wife she feels "like a tire" in Spanx.
Then there's the bathroom issue. The garments, which can be difficult to remove, often come with a "double gusset" opening that wearers say can be hard to negotiate. Last summer, in response to a deluge of emails citing mortifying experiences, a shapewear maker called Yummie Tummie decided to sponsor a "tell us your shapewear nightmares" competition.
The winner, who received a style consultation and $500 to spend on clothes, was 31-year-old New York college student Amanda Davis, whose story involved a bodysuit so tight that it pressed on her bladder. As she ran to the bathroom at her school, she debated, "Do I squeeze out of the Spanx or do I try to pee through the crotchless thingy?" After soaking herself, she had to skip class and go home to change.
Body-shapers have long played a supporting role in fashion trends. The great-grandmother of shapewear, the corset, was "the most controversial garment in the history of fashion," says Valerie Steele, director and chief curator at the Museum at the Fashion Institute of Technology, who wrote a book about the rigid, uncomfortable garment. The more-flexible girdle grew popular in the early 20th century, eventually becoming a key component of Christian Dior's nipped-waist "New Look," unveiled in 1947. Control-top pantyhose replaced girdles when women began heading to the gym en masse in the 1970s.
Then, in 1998, an office copy-machine saleswoman named Sara Blakely cut the feet off a pair of sheer control-top pantyhose so she could wear cream-colored pants to a party. Two years later, she founded Spanx, which became a staple red-carpet undergarment for already-slim celebrities such as Gwyneth Paltrow and Jessica Alba.
Douglas B. Jones
"What's the point of spending £500 on a dress if you don't have a straight tummy?" asks 26-year-old Frances Kinloch, who works at an investment bank in London and wears Spanx with everything except jeans. The problem is "you do look a bit like a granny in them," admits Ms. Kinloch, who removes her Spanx in the bathroom and spirits it away into her handbag when she's on a hot date.
High-end designer Roland Mouret has railed against Spanx, calling the process of secretly slipping out of the undergarments "sad."
Shapewear manufacturers are responding to consumers' concerns by trying to boost the aesthetic appeal of their utilitarian undergarments. This year, Spanx introduced an upscale collection called Haute Contour, with items like a lace thong with waist reinforcements that comes in colors like pink. "I said, 'Let's make it beautiful ... like shapewear in disguise,' " Ms. Blakely says.
Lingerie designer Bruno Schiavi launched a line in 2007 called Dr. Rey's Shapewear in collaboration with Beverly Hills plastic surgeon Dr. Robert Rey. Sold at Sears and on the HSN cable network, it features bodysuits and waist cinchers in bold prints like leopard and—arriving in stores later this season—snakeskin. "I always thought shapewear was so boring," says Mr. Schiavi.
Other companies are developing apparel with built-in body shapewear. A brand called Not Your Daughter's Jeans features a patented "Lift & Tuck" technology that the company says will make wearers drop a size, and is also introducing shaper tops in V- and cowl-neck styles in bright colors that are intended to be worn as a regular shirt. Yummie Tummie (tagline: "Show it off") has become known for its shapewear-camisole hybrids, which can be worn alone or peeking out from a blazer.
"I wanted to break down these barriers, so that you don't have to be confined to a sea of embarrassing bottoms," says Heather Thomson, founder of Yummie Tummie. It plans to begin selling a line of shapewear dresses early next year.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Monday, October 26, 2009
Who Needs Chopsticks When You Have a Gun?
A businessman facing murder charges stemming from a shooting in his restaurant on the 16th Street Mall told investigators he shot the victim in self-defense after being choked.
But an affidavit in the case says a witness gave a different story, that the restaurant owner was confronted over money he owed.
Yan De Yang, 40, owner of the Chopsticks & Sushi restaurant, 1630 Welton St., is being held without bond at the Denver jail on suspicion of first-degree murder.
Yang is charged with fatally shooting 29-year-old Lloyd Running Bear at the downtown eatery Thursday.
Running Bear was shot multiple times in the chest, according to an affidavit in the case.
Yang, who goes by the first name of "Dave," told investigators that he kicked an "intoxicated" man out of the sushi bar on Friday, Oct. 16 and that the man came back on Wednesday with two others, looking for him and making threats of reprisals, according to the affidavit.
Is the Bible obscene?
But first, some background. A man was arrested in Springfield, VA. His crime? Being nude in his own home. Apparently he had walked into his living room to drink some coffee and he was naked. It turns out there were no curtains for the living room and because of this a woman walking with her young son saw this man naked from the sidewalk. She called the police who sent five officers to the scene and arrested him. Now the Naked Man faces up to one year in prison.
Who knew that the Naked Guy in Friends was committing such an illegal act?
The Washington Post ran an online chat with a criminal defense attorney, and one reader made the following post:
Bowie, Md.: You keep reiterating that the prosecutor needs to "show he did something obscene per the statute".
The facts presented in this article indicate that he was doing something obscene. The man has no curtains drawn, and walks near windows so that others can see him naked from the street naked... Those do not seem like the actions of an innocent man.
Atchuthan Sriskandarajah: Being naked in one's own home is not obscene. Walking naked from one part of your home to another is not obscene. The case law in Virginia is very clear about this.
I guess some people seem to think that the mere act of being naked is obscene. This case has elicited international ridicule championed, of course, by the French, for whom nakedness is right up there with Liberty, Equality and Fraternity (see Nice beaches and Last Tango in Paris
Thursday, October 8, 2009
How to Bill 27 Hours in One Day
How does this hearken back to the Disco era? In 1969, the Justice Department filed suit claiming IBM maintained an illegal monopoly in computers. The suit spanned the Seventies, before the Justice Department under Reagan finally dropped the suit in 1982.
The Obama administration appears eager to crank up the dial on antitrust enforcement, according to WSJ, which cites investigations of Google in connection with its foray into the digital books market and Intel's dominant position in sales of microprocessorchips.
Cravath defended IBM in the earlier case, and many firm lawyers, including one David Boies, came of age logging interminable hours fending off the government watchdogs.
For a detailed look at Cravath's work in the IBM case check out the James B. Stewart 1983 book "The Partners," which still ranks as one of the more comprehensive and entertaining accounts of life insider corporate law firms.
Here is a long-ago review of the book by former Times editor Christopher Lehman-Haupt, who highlighted this anecdote from The Partners:
One young man working on the I.B.M. case for Cravath, Swaine succeeded in establishing a company record by billing 24 hours of work in a single day; one of his rivals promptly flew to California and, by exploiting the time difference, managed to bill 27 hours.
Ah, what associates would do now for that kind of billable output.
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Heidi Klum to Take Seal's Last Name - omg! news on Yahoo!
Heidi Klum to Take Seal's Last Name - omg! news on Yahoo!
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Monday, October 5, 2009
Loser and Kate Plus 8 or Kate Plus 9
The latest from The Biggest Loser. Apparently right after he put the kibosh on filming of Kate Plus 8 he had a night out on the town with new best bud Joe Francis, owner of the Girls Gone Wild franchise. And the news today is that he has withdrawn $230,000 from their joint bank account leaving $1000 in there. I guess he must have greater expenses than Kate Plus 8 has.
Friday, October 2, 2009
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Wanted: A Legal Mind
An unconventional job opportunity, to say the least, one with a fairly big downside and a fairly big upside. The bad: it doesn't pay. The good: it give a law student an opportunity to work fairly closely, it seems, on one of the largest (and most controversial) cases of the day.
Okay, we'll stop being cryptic. Here's the news: Arthur Folsom, the solo practitioner in Denver who's spearheading the defense of accused terrorist mastermind Najibullah Zazi, is hiring an intern. He placed an ad with the University of Denver Law School's career development center last week.
The ad is offering an “intern position for a current law student.” The “main responsibilities will be
conducting research for a federal terrorism case.”
Of course, you've got to be qualified to get the job. According to the ad, “good research skills” are “a must” and “experience on the federal level” is “preferred.” Other qualifications include “criminal defense knowledge.” That Folsom is looking for help isn't all that surprising. We've blogged in each of the last two days on Zazi's somewhat strange decision to pick Folsom to represent him. Folsom, a 37-year-old Denver solo-practitioner, has spent most of his career doing smaller-scale criminal work, like drunk-driving and drug-possession representations. Folsom has enlisted the help of other lawyers, but for now, according to his Web site, he's running a small operation. The office is comprised of just Folsom himself and a researcher.
Wendy Aiello, a spokeswoman for Art Folsom said in a statement: “Folsom Law Offices continues to build their defense team. Art Folsom is an alum and knows that the school will provide a talented intern.”
In other Zazi news: Earlier today he pleaded not guilty to a charge of conspiracy in Brooklyn federal court. Zazi was indicted last week on a charge that alleges he conspired with others to use explosive devices against persons or property in the United States. According to the WSJ, prosecutors told federal judge Raymond Dearie during the Tuesday hearing that they believed Zazi is a flight risk who should be placed under close surveillance. Zazi is a legal immigrant from Afghanistan.
The judge ordered Zazi held indefinitely without bail. Repping Zazi in court on Tuesday: J. Michael Dowling, who told a group of reporters after the hearing that prosecutors hadn't shown enough evidence to back the conspiracy against his client. "You can't convict him of the conspiracy charge he's under without someone else," Dowling said. "The government will have to come up with someone else to make it a conspiracy."
What the Folsom Law Office really needs is a clue.
Free Roman Polanski
We threw out the question on Monday: Is the prosecution of Roman Polanski warranted or best left alone?
LBers' responses were nearly unanimously in favor of bringing the 71-year-old film director back to California to make him pay for his crime. A reader named Steve Myson could have been speaking for most who chose to comment when he said:
He pled guilty and fled the jurisdiction. Why is this even up for debate?
It led us to wonder if there was anyone out there who felt differently, felt that Polanski was being treated unfairly or that the U.S. justice system was marching in too rigid or formalistic a fashion.
We didn't have to look far. Over at the Jezebel blog (subtitled “Celebrity, Sex, Fashion for Women”), Kate Harding points a finger at two groups, each of which is petitioning the move to bring Polanski back to the U.S. Click here for a list of one; here for the other. (Be forewarned, LBers. Jezebel throws out its fair share of four-letter words.)
Most of the signatories to the petition are Hollywood-celeb types or European public-thinkers. Writes, par example, the French writer and thinker Bernard-Henri Levy:
Apprehended like a common terrorist Saturday evening, September 26, as he came to receive a prize for his entire body of work, Roman Polanski now sleeps in prison.
He risks extradition to the United States for an episode that happened years ago and whose principal plaintiff repeatedly and emphatically declares she has put it behind her and abandoned any wish for legal proceedings.
Seventy-six years old, a survivor of Nazism and of Stalinist persecutions in Poland, Roman Polanski risks spending the rest of his life in jail for deeds which would be beyond the statute-of-limitations in Europe.
We ask the Swiss courts to free him immediately and not to turn this ingenious filmmaker into a martyr of a politico-legal imbroglio that is unworthy of two democracies like Switzerland and the United States. Good sense, as well as honor, require it.
And then there's Debra Winger (pictured), who, according to Variety on Monday demanded Polanski's release and criticized Swiss authorities for their “philistine collusion” in arresting Polanski as he entered the country.
“This fledgling festival has been unfairly exploited, and whenever this happens the whole art world suffers,” Winger said in a statement on Monday.
Continues Jezebel's Harding:
That's apparently what this is about, in the minds of all these great artistes: Philistinism. A failure to appreciate A) Polanski's genius and B) the sanctity of international film festivals.
No, I am not even kidding about the second part. From the SACD petition:
By their extraterritorial nature, film festivals the world over have always permitted works to be shown and for filmmakers to present them freely and safely, even when certain States opposed this. The arrest of Roman Polanski in a neutral country, where he assumed he could travel without hindrance, undermines this tradition: it opens the way for actions of which no one can know the effects.
Yes I can totally see how arresting a fugitive child rapist is a slippery slope toward censorship. If I were a creative professional, I'd certainly be concerned about the authorities coming after me and my work! Except, I am a creative professional, and I'm not worried, because unlike Roman Polanski, I have neither raped a child nor jumped bail and evaded capture for three decades.
To say that some of these arguments are specious is to put it mildly. For instance, just becuase Pope John Paul II forgave his would-be assassin did not exonerate the individual from his crime. And apparently Philistine collusion and Philistinism are affirmative defenses to a crime. And let us not forget the most hallowed of all legal principes: the sanctity of international film festivals.
America's Top Model/Lawyer
A few years ago, law firms decided not to publish pictures on their websites of their attorneys for fear that the attorneys would become victims of stalkers. Of course, the smart stalker would realize that stalking an attorney is the stupidest thing you could do. But in this battered economy, all the rules seem to have been tossed out. For instance, one law firm now offers not only head shots of lawyers but body shots as well (because it is really vital in picking a lawyer to see what they look like from the waist down). Above are a couple of pictures for one attorney that my colleague, Mary, seems particularly fixated with (and thank you, Mary for alerting me to this new phenomenon). Next thing you know, they will be doing 360 degree tours of an attorney (like the ones they do for houses on realtor web sites). I am sure this bold move by one law firm will be the one thing to spur a recovery in the legal industry.
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Friday, September 25, 2009
Follow up to things that make you go hmmmm. . .
Ways to Play With A Person's Mind
Things that make you go hmmmm
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Elevator Escapades
I want to create a new TV show along the lines of Taxicab Confessions. It will deal solely with elevators and all that transpires on them. Of course, that lends itself to many titillating possibilities but the first few episodes will focus solely on mundane stories drawn from real life. For instance, one story line will focus entirely on people rushing on and off elevators and the situations this sometimes creates. Like yesterday, around 5:00 pm I was headed back to the 10th floor at ACME when the elevator stopped on the sixth floor. A man was in such a rush to get home that he ran into the elevator without even checking to see if it was going down. It, of course, was not. But he did not want to admit his error even though he knew I knew and I knew he knew I knew. So he did not push any button. He just stood there and waited until I got off on 10. This episode will explore not only the surface humor of such an incident but delve into possible motivations for this guy not admitting his mistake and why people rush onto elevators without looking to see which way it is headed or whether people have fully gotten off (some never even wait for people to get off).
Another episode will focus on the many natural and artificial elements that make it onto an elevator. For instance, last night when I got on to leave, I saw two q-tips on the floor of the elevator. I did not check to see if they were used, but I did wonder how q-tips, of all things, would be on the floor of an elevator. So this episode would be a sort of a CSI-Denver, but the crime technicians would be elevator technicians investigating the appearance of the q-tips and what the q-tips contained.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Bowl-A-Thon
Most importantly, personnel from Acme donated nearly $1200 which made Acme one of the top fundraising teams as well. Overall, over $10,000 was raised for the DUDL.
Bi-coastal Polo
I was checking out pictures The Golden Fox had posted to her Facebook page and I saw one of her at a polo match. This was such a coincidence as the gang from Gossip Girl were at a polo match on the Monday episode. Their match was in Greenwich, and I presume GF’s one was in Spokane. GF was dressed to the nines with a poofy hat to boot. She was wearing all black which I did not realize was a polo match color, but maybe there was a memorial service for a fallen polo player after the match (or she only had one poofy hat which was black). The Gossip Girl episode had Serena ride off into the woods with one of the polo ponies and then this guy followed her on another pony and then presumably they hooked up in the forest (while the ponies patiently waited). I think that is more of an East Coast Gossip Girl thing; I doubt that happens out West.
Sexting in the USA
Last night, on 90210, Annie faced a dilemma. Admit to sleeping with Naomi’s boyfriend or have a nude picture of her texted around West Beverly by, you guessed it, Naomi (Naomi had to enlist the WB Tech Club to figure out how to send a text anonymously). Annie decided to admit to the affair that never happened. I am not sure, however, that the sexting was the worse option (the camera phone has really changed the high school dynamic). Either way her reputation is shot, but at least with one option, she does not become a liar as well. It may become a moot point as she looks like she may become the WB Carrie.
The episode was filled with many cautionary tales. Navid learned never tell your girlfriend not to speak to another guy because it makes you insecure. And I learned that WB has a surfing team.
Meanwhile, over at Melrose, we learned that the late Sydney really got around and that she may have had a daughter. And also to never give your fiancee an ultimatum not to talk to another guy.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Natural Born Killers
The Killers have soared past puberty to the age of maturity. I saw them at the start of this tour earlier this year and they have grown leaps and bounds since then. They have discovered what makes bands transcendent and that is to render their songs orchestral in arrangement. This ensures that what you hear on the album is not always what you hear in concert which is not always what you hear on the next tour. The songs literally evolve. Stuart Price provided much elasticity in his production such that Spaceman takes on a whole new dimension this tour. The Killers are not a jam band but they can jam like they mean it. Everything is in sync – the lighting, the stage, the multimedia curtain(s) and most importantly the band. They have to be, coming off a series of festival gigs in the UK and Lollapalooza in the US. Their set list rarely misses a beat and will only continue to get better. And Somebody Told Me and Mr. Brightside are songs that I have heard hundreds of times and I have never tired of them. Their tank is far from empty; they continue to evolve, because even natural born killers need to ply their trade.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Oh, what a night!!!
The new TV season started with a bang with the return of 90210 and the start of Melrose Place 2.0 These shows are not guilty pleasures; they are pure pleasure. For instance, 90210 has ditched the adults and is focusing 100% on high school drama. We have Adriana who was a drug addict who slept with pretty much half the school and became pregnant and gave the child up for adoption. Now she wants to be “No Drama” Adriana and she is asking her current boyfriend to take it slow. This leads to a great deal of pent-up frustration for the beau who is a virgin. Meanwhile Silver who almost killed herself and then almost killed half the cast is stable now and sporting a Rihanna ‘do (not the mohawk Rihanna) got back together and then was dumped by her long-standing boyfriend because she was texting another guy who is now in Montana (hope she is on the ACME network). Star vixen Naomi is dating an older man, at least she was until she found out he is married with three kids. That led her to pursue the new kid, Teddie, who really is not new as he is Adriana’s “first”. Finally we have Annie who was falsely accused by Naomi of sleeping with her boyfriend (actually Naomi’s sister slept with the boyfriend). This false accusation led Annie to call the police and rat out the underage drinking at the party which led to all the kids at the party having to do summer school. But that is not here or there for Annie as she thinks she may have hit and run a guy when she was drinking and driving and, of course, the guy died. But it turns out the real perp is Teddie.
Not to be outdone, Melrose begins with a murder of one of the veterans from the old show (who looks like she has not aged a year). This show features a bisexual publicist, a budding filmmaker, his fiancée, a chef, a poor med student, and a mysterious redhead played by Ashley Simpson Wentz. I predict good things for this show as long as Pete Wentz never appears on it.
Corrupting our Children
Apparently Pres. Obama wants to tell kids to dream big dreams, respect their teachers, study hard, and learn from failure. What an insidious, socialist message he is spreading particularly given the fact that many parents fail to tell their children to accept personal responsibility. Of course, it is rare for a President to do this, especially when they were academically-challenged like the last one.
Saturday, September 5, 2009
Topless women march in Central Park for right to bare breasts
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Imagine walking in Central Park and running into a mob of topless women (a fantasy for some, I know). But this nudity is not gratuitous; these women want the right to toplessness, i.e., to walk around topless like men can (I am not sure that allowing certain men to walk around without a shirt is that great an idea anyway). Apparently NYC is the only city that grants women such a right. Ah, the quest for liberty and equality never ends.
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
It truly is a reunion (sort of)
The show about nothing which was a show about everything and ended up being the show of our generation is actually having a reunion show. The cast of Seinfeld, reuniting on Curb Your Enthusiasm, will be playing themselves preparing to do a Seinfeld reunion on Curb. Thus, it is a reunion show within a reunion show. This means there will be some scenes from a Seinfeld “reunion” show portrayed on Curb. Both Jerry Seinfeld and Larry David are adamant that this will be the last “reunion” and that there will be some sense of closure. It will be interesting to see how they deal with the whole incarceration issue, which it turns out was Larry David’s idea. So bottom line – if you have been holding out hope for a Seinfeld reunion watch Curb because that may be all you get.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Teddy
My heart broke when I realized he would never be President. My heart breaks again knowing that he is gone. He was my first candidate, the man I so wanted to reach the White House. But that night in Chappaquidick kept him from being President, and as he would probably agree, rightfully so. It was a huge lapse in judgment. But eventually he took full responsibility and did his penance through a life of service. He was a visionary in regard to what it took to make this a better world, and a realist in regard to what it took to get there. He had the strangest bedfellows – conservatives who he would team with to pass monumental legislation in so many areas. Ask politicians like Sen. Hatch who they respected most – it would likely have been Sen. Kennedy. The fact that health care reform is on the table is due to him, and if he was in good health the last few months, we would have it today. He crushed me when he endorsed Obama over Hillary and part of me will never understand that, but I respect his reasoning. Respect he deserves; tribute even more. So much of what is good in our world we owe to him.
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Excerpts from my Facebook Rant
In the marketplace of ideas, truth is the central component to proper decision-making. If you are going to denigrate health care reform, please make sure you base it on the facts.
Why is health care reform relevant to you? Because you are only one job loss away from losing your coverage and if you get another job, then you are faced with the "pre-existing conditions" obstacle. Health care reform is not simply about... giving coverage to the uninsured, it is about controlling spiraling health care costs that will soon make health care cost prohibitive for the majority of Americans. Think about your rising premiums; think about your rising deductibles; think about what happens if you or one of your family members faces a major illness.
The reality is that a majority of Americans favor some type of heath care reform, and the reality is that when Americans learn the facts about the Democrats' proposals, they support this type of health care reform. Don't you owe it to your...self to learn the facts rather than rely on those who seek to gain from distorting the truth?Read More
Also for those who suggest that health care is not a right, if the right to bear arms (and therefore imperil life) is a right, then shouldn't the ability to save life be a right as well?
And for those who fear larger deficits, our President has said the plan has to be revenue neutral. Plus where were you when our prior administration led us into an ill-fated war over illusory WMD; a war for which we are still paying today and will be for years.
I do apologize for the flurry of posts, but I am passionate about this issue. A couple of days ago, a group of us from my church provided dinner to homeless teens. None of them seemed to be enjoying their homelessness. As for benefits, they get at... most 18 months of benefits then they have to head back to the streets. There is no health care on the streets. A just society thinks about all members of society.
Hasn't the last year shown us that immensely qualified people can lose their jobs through no fault of their own? And with it, they lose their health care? Why should the ability of people and their families to get health care be reliant on their job?
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Friday, August 14, 2009
A Swan Song Swan Song
Landon/Lara,
You both are the swanest of the swans.
Your names both begin with a “L”;
that much I can definitely say.
Also you both are towards the end of the alphabet;
An experience to which I am unable to relate.
One of you has ACL/MCL/meniscus issues;
Hopefully the other does not.
One of you recently went to Montana;
I don’t know if the other one ever has.
While I was not exposed to your work product,
I can say with assurance that you both shall excel.
One of you will grapple with law and policy;
The other will handle patents galore.
But no matter what happens,
What challenges life may bring,
No matter how contentious a case,
Or vexing an issue,
Always remember,
That your names will always both begin
With a “L”.
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Forget Teen's Choice, Miley has shot at Olympic Gold
Apparently the Olympics are considering pole dancing as an Olympic sport. While this "sport" would likely garner its fair share of rhythmic gymnasts seeking another medal, it may draw some celebrities who have demonstrated some skills with poles. Madonna would have to be the favorite given the prowess she displayed on her last tour. Kim Kardashian may be a contender for the mere fact that she has one in her bedroom so she could practice 24-7 (wouldn't it be ironic is she joined stepdad, Bruce Jenner as an Olympic medalist?). Britney would have to be in the running as well and Demi Moore may be the Dana Torres of the sport. As for Miley, clearly she needs more practice.
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
ABDC
The arrival of a new season of America’s Best Dance Crew (“ABDC”) is always bittersweet for me. While I am thrilled to see America’s best crews display their talents, it also reminds me of the frustration I have experienced in organizing a dance crew at ACME. Unfortunately my talents are wasted on this motley crew of dancers who disdain practice and whose idea of technique is doing the “Lawn Mower.” This must have been how P. Diddy felt when he tried to train dancers for his tours. There is a glimmer of hope, however. Ironically, the tragic death of the Gloved One has freed up his stable of dancers plus there is an excellent farm system of dancers living in the Jackson mansion including those who may or may not be saplings from the MJ tree and other Jackson kin including Jermajesty Jackson. And as more possible spawn of MJ are discovered the greater the pool of talent. If I successfully recruit even half of these elite dancers I will be able to unveil my newest performance piece in the Castle Rock Kitchen. Yes, I am going to recreate the infamous Pepsi commercial in which MJ’s hair looked like a bonfire. Stay tuned.
Saturday, August 8, 2009
This Movie Looks Like it Will Be Excellent
The Pot Calling the Kettle Black
The other day I had the privilege to go see Rep. Nancy Pelosi give a press conference at the Colorado Coalition for the Homeless which provides housing and medical care for the homeless. ACME lawyers, thanks to the initiative of former ACME lawyer, Dagwood, runs a legal clinic there, and I volunteer at that clinic. So the CCH kindly invited us to the press conference. As we walked there on the scorching hot day, from blocks away we could see the protest signs. When we were about a block away, I read one of the signs a woman was carrying and on it it contained the words “you politician” instead of “you politicians.” I was not going to say anything but as we passed her she thrust the sign in my face. So I told her, “your sign is missing an “s”.” She gave me a quizzical look and I walked on. I am sure at some point in the past and likely some point in the future this woman would have also protested about immigration and probably exhorted that all people living in the U.S. need to know English. Shouldn’t such people learn their own language first before demanding that others learn it? Perhaps if we funded our educational system more the protester would have had a more articulate sign.
Friday, August 7, 2009
Jeff Gordon, I am Not
I had my first and perhaps my last go-karting experience of my life this past Wednesday. I should have known when I was heading down the dirt road to the “track” that this would end badly. I was hoping for a nice oval track but instead got one with more hairpins than Marie Antoinette’s hairdo. And the karts were glorified lawn mowers, and I don’t mean riding mowers, but literally the engine part of the mower with a seat wedged on the end. But I decided to give it a go. Big mistake! I should have hung out with cute girl running the show; maybe she would have let me be the flag enforcer. Instead I ventured out. Even though I knew it was the wrong thing to do, at every turn I would brake to ensure I would not spin out. Little did I know I would probably have been safer spinning out and therefore on the grass safe from the manic interns and my lead foot colleagues (four of them were reprimanded for aggressive driving with the “black flag”; I wonder if they will include that in their resumes).
I was passed left, right, and sometime it felt like center. I think at one point one intern, Danitella Versace, passed me on the edge of the track. I must have been lapped a couple of times by Kashi Dan (seriously, who knew Kelloggs made Kashi?). It was the longest 10 minutes of my life. My only solace was that I missed the dustup caused by Dandrea Patric who before spinning off the track nearly took out three other drivers (I think she thought we had actually picked bowling instead of go-karting).
Just my luck, my performance is memorialized on film, video, and in the memories of all who attended. But I vow not only to pick myself up by the bootstrap or the helmet strap but to train for a future rematch. I am either going to enlist the little kid (who was doing 60 mph turns on the track) or the cute girl as my Yoda/Princess Leia and master this kart thing (either that or figure out how to get on the kiddie course as soon as possible).
Heaven and Hell in the Garden of Brighton
In one of the most cosmically ironic quirks of scheduling, the Christian rock festival, HeavenFest, is on the same weekend and in the same town as the Adams County Fair. HeavenFest appears to be a musical festival without the “festiv”eness. Alcohol is banned, as are bikinis, and bellybuttons (well, you can keep your bellybutton but you cannot bare your belly). Apparently the organizers forgot that at the Wedding at Cana wine was free-flowing thanks to Jesus’ miracle. And they seem to overlook that Eve was baring much more than her bellybutton in the Garden of Eden.
Meanwhile, over at the Adams County Fair, I am sure that not only will there be alcohol and bellybuttons but that alcohol will be poured over said bellies and perhaps even licked off the bellies. Could you imagine the shock if one of the HeavenFesters attended the ACF by mistake? Inevitably there will be some inadvertent mixing of the two crowds, perhaps at the Kum’n’Go (I am not making that name up) the famed convenience store in Brighton. I think they call this mixing of the tribes, ARMAGEDDON.
Be careful, you Facebooking Lawyers
Facebooking Judge Catches Lawyer in Lie, Sees Ethical Breaches #ABAChicago
Posted Jul 31, 2009, 03:16 pm CDT
By Molly McDonough
Galveston, Texas-area lawyers on Facebook may want to double-check their friends list, especially if they’re about to appear before Judge Susan Criss.
That’s because Criss, a state court judge who is learning to adapt to social media as a way to connect with long-lost friends and is leveraging Facebook as a judicial campaign tool, has also learned a few things she didn’t expect.
Biggest surprise: Even lawyers don’t fully grasp how public social media is, even when privacy controls are in place.
“Anyone can cut and paste,” said Criss, who was part of a Friday ABA Annual Meeting program “Courts and Media in the 21st Century: Twitterers, Bloggers, the New Media, the Old Media, and What's a Judge to Do?” sponsored by the ABA’s Judicial Division.
Criss recalled one time that a lawyer asked for a continuance because of the death of her father. The lawyer had earlier posted a string of status updates on Facebook, detailing her week of drinking, going out and partying. But in court, in front of Criss, she told a completely different story.
Then there was the lawyer who complained about having to handle a motion in Criss’s court. Criss playfully zinged her, too—on Facebook, of course.
Criss has seen lawyers on the verge of crossing, if not entirely crossing, ethical lines when they complain about clients and opposing counsel. And she admonished one family member who jeopardized her own tort case by bragging online about how much money she would get from a lawsuit.
The judge's near-breathless accounts of questionable online activity by members of the bench and bar had many in the audience wondering whether Facebook, Twitter and their ilk are worth the headache.
To Criss, there's no going back. With self-imposed ground rules—no politics, no blogging about cases—she's steaming right ahead.
Indeed, she's among a growing number of lawyers and judges who have begun using Facebook for personal, professional and public interest reasons.
JD Supra this week started an attempt to track lawyers using Facebook, much in the same way it is tracking lawyers on Twitter.
Judges questioned Criss for more details about her ground rules. And they asked whether the ABA should be exploring model rules relating to Twitter and Facebook.
Criss said she’s the first to admit these social networks are new to her, but her ground rules are simple. She follows her ethical canons and is careful about what she says and who she friends. Yes to all lawyers—to avoid an appearance that she favors one side over another. Friending the general public is trickier. So far, she's been more selective.
As for whether the ABA needs to address social media in its Model Rules, she and other panelists said no. “The rules are pretty good,” Criss said. That’s not to say that the ABA shouldn’t explore new media and its impact on lawyers, judges and the law.
“The medium is always going to change,” she said. “We need to always adapt.”
A Historic Day for America
http://www.9news.com/video/default.aspx?maven_playerId=newsarticleplayer&maven_referralPlaylistId=playlist&maven_referralObject=1207547490
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Cruel Summer
Is life governed by fate or coincidence? This is the central conceit of the movie, (500) Days of Summer. It also ironically has many links to my day and my life. If you read my post yesterday, you would know that I mused on the subject of “one true love,” with me reaching a conclusion that it does exist but very rarely. And that ended up being the theme of this wonderful, sublime, enticing, all-too-ephemeral golden nugget of a movie. I won’t spoil any part of it for those planning on seeing it, and I urge you all to see it. But I will not spoil it when I say it is not a love story, because it makes that patently clear in the best prefatory start to a movie ever. But it is a story imbued with the question of love. I also am not spoiling anything when I note that it tracks a relationship from the courting to infatuation to break-up to reconnection. In this manner it drew eerie parallels to a relationship I once had with with this woman I thought was the “one”. It was quite a short-lived relationship but one with flickering embers that burned for about a decade leading to an emotional reconnection a couple of years ago. But the reconnection of feelings (and these may have just been feelings on my part because I did not ask and did not know if it was a reconnection; I did not ask if she felt something too; I did not want to know because I knew it could not happen, not at that stage of my life, so I willed it not to happen) also ended up being the extinguishing of the embers and she is now happily married with a newborn.
The breakdown of this relationship happened nearly twenty years ago and elicited the same response that the protagonist of this movie endures sans the drinking and degradation of his work product. In the movie, the guy starts drinking and quits his job: I never reached such extremes, but I was in the throes of my romantic period and I know the frustration he felt at the inability of what felt like true love at the time to transcend obstacles both external and internal. The “happy” ending is that I would have this “true love” feeling two more times, and for all I know, I may have that feeling in the future. This, of course, suggests that there is no such thing as “true love” or that I am incapable of achieving it. As an aside, Jung had this theory of the container and the contained, with the container in the relationship being the one who nurtures the relationship; to reach that level requires a connection at the deepest level, but it has been achieved, at least in literature (see the Birkin-Ursula relationship) in Women In Love.
At any rate, a movie that leaves you churning thoughts in your mind hours after the movie ends, is a magical movie. And this is a magical movie and not just because the utterly cute and talented Zooey Deschanel is in it.
By the way, my way of coping with that broken relationship 20 years ago? I made a mix tape which I called Disintegration in honor of the classic Cure album. The first side (yes, there were tapes and sides back then) contained the saddest songs I knew and the other side contained the most joyous and hopeful songs I knew. My theory was that you have to travel into that heart of darkness to see the light of hope; you have to open yourself up to deep pain you feel to begin to heal. It is not an easy or pleasant experience but ultimately it is a rewarding one,
After the Rose . . .
My strategy with reality shows is to wait for the last couple of episodes to begin watching. This enables me to dispense with all the preliminaries, i.e., selection process, eliminations, etc. until the core group is left. I do this with American Idol, Survivor; heck, I even do this with books and films I know I will not have the time to read or watch (except for those I go to the spoiler web sites). So, of course, with The Bachelorette, I was able to weave myself in at the next to the last episode and I did not have to deal with too-nice Jake or too-slimy Wes. And I was treated to a real cliffhanger, or at least as close as to cliffhangers these “find your perfect mate” shows can get. While I think Jillian did a terrific job of masking who her real choice would be, I do think she “loved” the three of them, and would have been happy with any of them. I mean one minute she is sucking face with Kipton (literally the entire time they spent together on screen their faces were one). But she chose the guy that was her best friend and made her laugh; of course, it helped that he was 6’2”, 200 lbs. Even his dorky hair and “high school gym class” green swim shorts did not dissuade her nor his inability to rise to the occasion on their first night together. But per the volcano imagery for the next date, I think they resolved that issue.
At the end of the day, this proves a fundamental point I have come to realize about love. When I was in my late teens/early 20s, I bought into the love ideal and the “one right person out there for you.” But as Jillian demonstrated, it is possible to experience love more than once and for her, even simultaneously. I do believe for certain couples, perhaps 5%, there is the romantic ideal. You can identify them as the ones who still like to talk to each other, be in the same room with each other, and hold hands after 20 years. Who knows, maybe I will get to experience that one day even though my first shot at it did not work. For those who have it, treasure it. For love truly is a many-splendored thing.
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